Pondering....

I am feeling a little lonely right now so I thought I would sit and type. My baby girl has been gone since Tuesday night and this has been the longest time she has ever spent away from us. I honestly thought it wouldn't be too big of a deal because people send their kids to their grandparents for a week at a time and I have always wondered what it felt like to be able to get rid of your kid for that long. Well, let me tell you, it is not easy or for me it isn't. I have been so used to having her with me all day everyday and then to go from not even getting to see her for a week has been traumatic for me.

Isn't amazing what entertainment your kids can bring you. You think when they are around and in their terrible two's how irritated and stressed out you can get. It seems like they are either bugging you to get them something, whining, climbing on your leg when you are cooking, crying for no apparent reason, etc. and you just want to hand them off to the first stranger that comes along. I have been without my little neusence (spelling ?) since Tuesday night and I don't get to see her till later on tonight!!!!

Why you might ask??? We have gone through some major changes in the Ruff Family. I decided that I was finally going to take charge in my life and do something for myself and try to pursue my dream of being a nurse (if I could do it all over again I would have been a plastic surgeon but seeing that isn't going to happen with a kid at home, I will settle for being a nurse in the plastic surgeon field). I enrolled myself into a Medical Assistant program. I am hoping this will put me one step closer to getting my RN. It is a 10 month program and I am taking the night classes from 6-10pm. When I did it and all the excitement went away, reality sank in and all the concerns came.... how are Brian and Brooklyn going to handle me not being there at night cooking dinner, how is Brian going to do with giving Brooklyn a bath, dinner, and getting her down at night, why am I putting us into more debt, can I really do this, is this what I want to do, all these things.....then I stopped and told myself, "You CAN do this, you NEED to do this, and I have taken care of Brooklyn at night for a long time, Brian can do the same thing, it is just dinner, bath and bedtime." So I have been doing it for about 3 weeks now and I can tell you, I ABSOLUTELY love it!!!!!!! Hands down, love it!!!!!

On top of putting myself in this program, I started a new job!!! It is a stress free job at an oil and gas company and the most laid back atomosphere. Something I need right now since I am putting all my energy into school.

SSOOOOO..............

I start school, I get a job, my parents are in the middle of settling into their new house, Brian's mom is in the middle of training for a new job, Brooklyn can't start school till Monday.....kind of in a bind. Only option we have is to send her to College Station with Aunt Katie for the week. That is why Brooklyn has been gone.

Don't get me wrong, she is having the time of her life down there right now. Of course, I have called at least 30 times a day to check on her but my sister has also done a very good job of taking pictures and sending them to me. I am sure Brooklyn's feet haven't touched the ground since she got there, she has been spoiled to the max and I am going to have to undo everything Katie has done. I know they have taken her to get pizza, ice cream, movies, to the park, shopping, sleeping in the bed with her at night (BIG THING I AM GOING TO HAVE TO UNDO). So I know she is having the time of her life while I am sitting at home just longing for a hug from my little baby girl. :-(

But she is coming home tonight and I am counting down the hours!!!!!!!!!!!! I miss my sweet angel. Now ask me in about 2 weeks and I might be ready to get rid of her again...hahahahahaha.